[Ah. The text he'd been dreading. Somehow he'd thought all the pacing he'd been doing, and the texts with SecUnit would better prepare him for when it came. Alas, they did not.]
The system which revives us had a few glitches. Friday was one of them.
Are you in the cabin? This is probably something best kept out of text.
[He doesn't respond to that, figures he'll be there shortly enough as it is. This would be a good time for him to mentally prepare what he's going to tell her, but all his circuits feel fried and frazzled. He hadn't even been at the party when things had gotten bad, nor really participated in anything, and yet he still feels drained from the experience of even being around during that time.
He politely knocks before entering, not that he thinks either of them care about being caught 'naked' but because he doesn't want to startle her.]
Good day.
[Carefully shutting the door behind him, so no one else can overhear what is sure to be an extremely awkward conversation.]
Shall I start at the beginning or is there anything specific you'd like to know first?
[So it did have something to do with being killed. That makes some amount of sense, an empty body to take over before Friday was able to revive them. That confirms suspicions they'd had earlier.]
Well, to start, it turns out the ghosts that maintain this vessel are previous passengers as we were all told. So while that's not a positive, it does mean the Captain or Friday wasn't lying about that we were informed of that. Small comfort considering what's coming next.
[He sighs, there's no polite way of framing this is there?]
I'm not sure what caused it, but they broke free from being ghosts and went looking for new bodies. How they were able to do that is outside my area of expertise, but they were able to gain control of bodies of those who died I presume. Or that seems to be how it functioned.
Friday was affected as well, which may have had something to do with it, since she's the one who maintains the system that brings us back to life.
[She's listening to him as he speaks. Passengers from a previous voyage. Is that what they all have to look forward to? Becoming so trapped that there's nothing but an ever growing desire to get free? It makes some sense, but it is concerning.]
Ah. That would certainly do it. Friday, I mean. And so there was someone...in my...body? [That's what she's gathering, isn't it? She frowns. She doesn't remember anything that happened. She can't find any memories of it in her cortex and...that's the part that's disorienting. Shouldn't she have been able to if she was still up and walking around?]
Yes, and someone who was pretending to be you. It was a decent enough effort, but the mannerisms were wrong, she didn't walk like you, nor move her eyes in the same way.
[Even without the callous disregard about ever seeing her daughter again, Max would have been suspicious simply by the lack of lingering glances as she passed people.]
I talked to a few of them, the one in Jeff the most. His name is, or was rather, Chase, and he was fairly forthcoming with information, though I've no idea how much of it is trustworthy. However; they seemed confident in their ability to take over the ship and the passengers and when people are assured of victory, they tend to reveal things that they shouldn't.
They were killing more and more passengers to allow others in the ship to take over, from what I gather this happened throughout the month, culminating in a large event at the Halloween party. I wasn't present for that, but considering the pool exploded through the lower floor I'm assuming the death count was quite high.
[Maeve nods at the comment about the mannerisms.] Was it very obvious or just because of your detailed understanding of me as a person?
[It seems like something that not so many people would have noticed, but she's also not sure.]
Hm. That is certainly a lot of information. [She's trying to consider what happened.] Do you know if...anyone was harmed because of me? [She'll figure it out later, but she's curious to know how much Max heard.]
Somewhat, but I tend to not look at people's faces as much as I think most humans do. My kind, Omnics, there's only one other left in existence that has eyes that move the way mine do. They stopped manufacturing them like this, I assume because of the cost. And all the thousands of others have no facial expressions which is what I'm used to. I'm not exceptionally good at parsing expressions anyway, so I tend to pay more attention to how people stand or move or what they do with their hands.
[He gives an exaggerated shrug as if he didn't just admit something rather personal about how he perceives the world.]
No, I don't know, we didn't ask. But I'd think it likely, they were trying to bring others out of the ship, so I assume she must have done the same. But no one said anything if she did, it wasn't as obvious as Chase killing Crichton.
Do you think they'd hold it against you? It wasn't you after all.
[It does make a small flicker of a smile pass over her face, but she looks down at a spot on the floor for perhaps a few seconds longer than strictly necessary. She hasn't been overly aware of how she moves or things she does, but now she feels like she ought to be.] I didn't realize you paid such close attention, darling.
Mmm. [There's a slight fidgeting her, more smoothing down the front of her clothes. She's certainly anxious about it.]
Even if they do not, I still worry, I suppose. That it will have caused a terrible impression somehow. Even if it wasn't me. And I'm not certain it will necessarily stop the feeling of guilt for settling in anyway.
I can't help it. And I'm also around you more than many others, being that we share living quarters.
[Not that he uses them that often, but he still sees her more than 95% of the other passengers.]
I'd say they shouldn't hold such things against you, but humans are emotional beings. And often irrational, so anything is possible. But at least there's so many others in the same position, having gone through the same turmoil, that they at least should understand that you personally had no part in it. But... they're only one piece of the whole, how you feel is something else entirely.
[And he's definitely noticed how much she's fidgeting.]
That is fair. [But she likes teasing him just a little.]
How I feel. [Maeve frowns a little.] I don't know how I feel. Except like I missed a step somewhere. I can still so clearly remember the nothing I was trapped in, but time has moved and I missed Ruby's birthday. I meant to throw her a little party.
[She looks down at her lap, trying to get her thoughts in order.] It's like if Delos took memories from me, but I knew they did...and now I don't know what happened.
So you were trapped elsewhere than inside your body?
[He's not sure what she means by 'nothing'.]
I wonder if the woman who was using your body has those memories, which would mean that they're encoded in our essence rather than in our physical self. And that's... I think I understand why so many of the humans were having an existential crisis about all of this. Because that's a complete departure from how we work. There's lots I've done I don't remember, I've had my entire system wiped before, but this seems intrinsically different in ways that I'm not sure I can articulate.
[She nods] I was nothing and everything around me was nothing. But I was aware the whole time. Incorporeal and just...existing. I couldn't stop. All I had were my thoughts.
[There's a blank look in her eyes as she stares, letting herself get lost in the memories of it. It felt like so much longer. She shakes herself out of it, mind catching up with the conversation.]
It's possible. Delos used to keep us from knowing things, but nothing was ever fully deleted. It just was hidden until I woke up. I don't know.
So you couldn't move nor interact with the surroundings? Well I suppose there weren't any surroundings, but ... I'm not quite sure I understand? How can what you exist in be nothing?
[Whatever it is, it sounds horrid, which explains a lot about why those who returned were so determined to not be put back there. ]
Hm. The Captain pulls us from our timeline, but what he pulls is a dataset, a semblance of our essence from a fixed point on that timeline. Our true selves are still there, with no idea that a duplicate of them was made from what's essentially a backup. So it would make sense that what he pulls is simply... data. And the bodies we have are constructed based on what we think they should be. Skulduggery once said that the Captain sees people's souls rather than their actual corporeal form. I suppose the body is separate from the soul portion in some way I can't quite fathom. And then when you were removed from yours, your essence was put... elsewhere.
No. I could not. [She considers it.] It was just empty space. Endless on all sides. At least it felt endless and empty and I was nothing inside of it. Just my consciousness.
[She cannot blame the people that didn't want to go back, but she doesn't like whoever took away her body anyway.]
I am still getting used to the idea of having a soul at all. It's certainly unusual. Mmm. It was put elsewhere, yes. And I don't ever want to return to that.
I wonder what the purpose of that is, your consciousness continuing but in a vacuous void. If that's what awaits all of us who outlive our usefulness and run out of the ability to be batteries for the captain...
[He doesn't finish that sentence because he's not sure what any of them would do about it. Other than try to avoid it at all costs. So in that sense he understands why someone would take over another body and try to continue their existence. But for as selfish and narcissistic as Max is, he's not sure he could do that. Partly because the idea of overtaking someone is violently abhorrent to him, and also because if he can't have his body then it's inferior and he doesn't want it. ]
As am I. Even the concept of having a soul is, well, strange. There's a faction of Omnics in my world, the Shambali, who believe in that concept and some sort of eternal consciousness that permeates all beings. But I never considered it could be true, it seemed like deluded and wishful thinking.
[Maeve shrugs] I have tried to understand. I can't tell if it's for further torture or if there's actually any thought or control over it. I don't know.
I believe that is the point of religion. To give people...and omnics something to believe in. That there's something waiting for us. I guess, in a way, the Valley Beyond is sort of like that. It was something much more beautiful than that and people still had physical form.
It's downright obnoxious when things occur for no tangible reason. Not that I presume the world to be neat and orderly, but in a place that was manifested purposefully by design, there should be thought put into the systems that exist here. [He sighs. Why couldn't it all be simple and explainable.]
The idea of an afterlife is a comforting thought even if the reality is much different. I.. see the allure. It would be nice if your world's Valley Beyond was the place awaiting us here. After all, he could have picked any of them, any version of what awaits after death from infinite realities. But this is what he went with?
That would mean expecting the Captain to be concerned about whether or not things were understandable and systematically thought out. I get the feeling Friday is the one doing most of the planning and generally keeping things running. [She could be wrong, but...she's pretty sure she's not.]
I'm not certain I understand it myself. I certainly would also prefer the Valley Beyond. I'd rather not have to worry about murdering others or being murdered, but...I guess at least it's not new to me. I don't know what I'd have done if I wasn't used to it.
Most likely, he does seem the type to delegate the parts that seem boring to someone else. Which we should probably be grateful for in a way. The alternative would be him utterly obsessed with every single minor detail and that would be insufferable.
It's different here though, they come back. And also, it wasn't you doing the murdering in this case. But those who've never experienced it won't be taking this well. The laundry room will be full of humans having breakdowns at any moment.
[There is a moment of deep consideration] That would definitely likely end in displeasure across the board. I would hate to think of what he would decide should he believe everything very important.
I know it was not. [She smiles a little] Is that where they go for their breakdowns? Do you often spend time close enough to the laundry to notice?
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
rosecarmine
nov 2 [Texts]
Date: 2022-11-04 04:57 am (UTC)I don't...
[There's a long moment before she texts anything more]
I'm missing time.
I know I died.
But I thought it didn't take this long to come back.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-11-05 06:02 am (UTC)The system which revives us had a few glitches. Friday was one of them.
Are you in the cabin? This is probably something best kept out of text.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-11-05 06:08 am (UTC)Yes. I haven't left.
I should change.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-11-05 06:23 am (UTC)Would you like me to bring you anything?
(no subject)
Date: 2022-11-05 06:26 am (UTC)wantneed anything.Just answers.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-11-07 04:08 am (UTC)He politely knocks before entering, not that he thinks either of them care about being caught 'naked' but because he doesn't want to startle her.]
Good day.
[Carefully shutting the door behind him, so no one else can overhear what is sure to be an extremely awkward conversation.]
Shall I start at the beginning or is there anything specific you'd like to know first?
(no subject)
Date: 2022-11-07 04:18 am (UTC)Hello, Maximilien.
[If she sounds and looks tired, she's not hiding it. It's too much work to hide it for her right now]
Perhaps at the beginning. All I can remember is a boy stabbing me...and then...nothing.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-11-12 06:56 am (UTC)[So it did have something to do with being killed. That makes some amount of sense, an empty body to take over before Friday was able to revive them. That confirms suspicions they'd had earlier.]
Well, to start, it turns out the ghosts that maintain this vessel are previous passengers as we were all told. So while that's not a positive, it does mean the Captain or Friday wasn't lying about that we were informed of that. Small comfort considering what's coming next.
[He sighs, there's no polite way of framing this is there?]
I'm not sure what caused it, but they broke free from being ghosts and went looking for new bodies. How they were able to do that is outside my area of expertise, but they were able to gain control of bodies of those who died I presume. Or that seems to be how it functioned.
Friday was affected as well, which may have had something to do with it, since she's the one who maintains the system that brings us back to life.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-11-12 04:25 pm (UTC)Ah. That would certainly do it. Friday, I mean. And so there was someone...in my...body? [That's what she's gathering, isn't it? She frowns. She doesn't remember anything that happened. She can't find any memories of it in her cortex and...that's the part that's disorienting. Shouldn't she have been able to if she was still up and walking around?]
Do you know much about them? The ghosts.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-11-23 12:18 am (UTC)[Even without the callous disregard about ever seeing her daughter again, Max would have been suspicious simply by the lack of lingering glances as she passed people.]
I talked to a few of them, the one in Jeff the most. His name is, or was rather, Chase, and he was fairly forthcoming with information, though I've no idea how much of it is trustworthy. However; they seemed confident in their ability to take over the ship and the passengers and when people are assured of victory, they tend to reveal things that they shouldn't.
They were killing more and more passengers to allow others in the ship to take over, from what I gather this happened throughout the month, culminating in a large event at the Halloween party. I wasn't present for that, but considering the pool exploded through the lower floor I'm assuming the death count was quite high.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-11-23 02:57 am (UTC)[It seems like something that not so many people would have noticed, but she's also not sure.]
Hm. That is certainly a lot of information. [She's trying to consider what happened.] Do you know if...anyone was harmed because of me? [She'll figure it out later, but she's curious to know how much Max heard.]
(no subject)
Date: 2022-11-26 06:09 am (UTC)[He gives an exaggerated shrug as if he didn't just admit something rather personal about how he perceives the world.]
No, I don't know, we didn't ask. But I'd think it likely, they were trying to bring others out of the ship, so I assume she must have done the same. But no one said anything if she did, it wasn't as obvious as Chase killing Crichton.
Do you think they'd hold it against you? It wasn't you after all.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-11-27 04:08 am (UTC)Mmm. [There's a slight fidgeting her, more smoothing down the front of her clothes. She's certainly anxious about it.]
Even if they do not, I still worry, I suppose. That it will have caused a terrible impression somehow. Even if it wasn't me. And I'm not certain it will necessarily stop the feeling of guilt for settling in anyway.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-11-30 07:35 am (UTC)[Not that he uses them that often, but he still sees her more than 95% of the other passengers.]
I'd say they shouldn't hold such things against you, but humans are emotional beings. And often irrational, so anything is possible. But at least there's so many others in the same position, having gone through the same turmoil, that they at least should understand that you personally had no part in it. But... they're only one piece of the whole, how you feel is something else entirely.
[And he's definitely noticed how much she's fidgeting.]
(no subject)
Date: 2022-12-01 02:37 am (UTC)How I feel. [Maeve frowns a little.] I don't know how I feel. Except like I missed a step somewhere. I can still so clearly remember the nothing I was trapped in, but time has moved and I missed Ruby's birthday. I meant to throw her a little party.
[She looks down at her lap, trying to get her thoughts in order.] It's like if Delos took memories from me, but I knew they did...and now I don't know what happened.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-12-02 04:14 am (UTC)[He's not sure what she means by 'nothing'.]
I wonder if the woman who was using your body has those memories, which would mean that they're encoded in our essence rather than in our physical self. And that's... I think I understand why so many of the humans were having an existential crisis about all of this. Because that's a complete departure from how we work. There's lots I've done I don't remember, I've had my entire system wiped before, but this seems intrinsically different in ways that I'm not sure I can articulate.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-12-02 09:47 pm (UTC)[There's a blank look in her eyes as she stares, letting herself get lost in the memories of it. It felt like so much longer. She shakes herself out of it, mind catching up with the conversation.]
It's possible. Delos used to keep us from knowing things, but nothing was ever fully deleted. It just was hidden until I woke up. I don't know.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-12-07 06:18 am (UTC)[Whatever it is, it sounds horrid, which explains a lot about why those who returned were so determined to not be put back there. ]
Hm. The Captain pulls us from our timeline, but what he pulls is a dataset, a semblance of our essence from a fixed point on that timeline. Our true selves are still there, with no idea that a duplicate of them was made from what's essentially a backup. So it would make sense that what he pulls is simply... data. And the bodies we have are constructed based on what we think they should be. Skulduggery once said that the Captain sees people's souls rather than their actual corporeal form. I suppose the body is separate from the soul portion in some way I can't quite fathom. And then when you were removed from yours, your essence was put... elsewhere.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-12-08 01:35 am (UTC)[She cannot blame the people that didn't want to go back, but she doesn't like whoever took away her body anyway.]
I am still getting used to the idea of having a soul at all. It's certainly unusual. Mmm. It was put elsewhere, yes. And I don't ever want to return to that.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-12-10 08:45 am (UTC)[He doesn't finish that sentence because he's not sure what any of them would do about it. Other than try to avoid it at all costs. So in that sense he understands why someone would take over another body and try to continue their existence. But for as selfish and narcissistic as Max is, he's not sure he could do that. Partly because the idea of overtaking someone is violently abhorrent to him, and also because if he can't have his body then it's inferior and he doesn't want it. ]
As am I. Even the concept of having a soul is, well, strange. There's a faction of Omnics in my world, the Shambali, who believe in that concept and some sort of eternal consciousness that permeates all beings. But I never considered it could be true, it seemed like deluded and wishful thinking.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-12-11 06:44 am (UTC)I believe that is the point of religion. To give people...and omnics something to believe in. That there's something waiting for us. I guess, in a way, the Valley Beyond is sort of like that. It was something much more beautiful than that and people still had physical form.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-12-16 07:32 am (UTC)The idea of an afterlife is a comforting thought even if the reality is much different. I.. see the allure. It would be nice if your world's Valley Beyond was the place awaiting us here. After all, he could have picked any of them, any version of what awaits after death from infinite realities. But this is what he went with?
(no subject)
Date: 2022-12-17 03:07 am (UTC)I'm not certain I understand it myself. I certainly would also prefer the Valley Beyond. I'd rather not have to worry about murdering others or being murdered, but...I guess at least it's not new to me. I don't know what I'd have done if I wasn't used to it.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-12-19 03:29 am (UTC)It's different here though, they come back. And also, it wasn't you doing the murdering in this case. But those who've never experienced it won't be taking this well. The laundry room will be full of humans having breakdowns at any moment.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-12-19 03:49 am (UTC)I know it was not. [She smiles a little] Is that where they go for their breakdowns? Do you often spend time close enough to the laundry to notice?
(no subject)
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